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Home > Love's Labour's Lost > ACT I - SCENE II. The same.

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ACT I - SCENE II. The same.
Enter DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO and MOTH

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
1    Boy, what sign is it when a man of great spirit
2    grows melancholy?
MOTH
3    A great sign, sir, that he will look sad.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
4    Why, sadness is one and the self-same thing, dear imp.
MOTH
5    No, no; O Lord, sir, no.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
6    How canst thou part sadness and melancholy, my
7    tender juvenal?
MOTH
8    By a familiar demonstration of the working, my tough senior.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
9    Why tough senior? why tough senior?
MOTH
10   Why tender juvenal? why tender juvenal?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
11   I spoke it, tender juvenal, as a congruent epitheton
12   appertaining to thy young days, which we may
13   nominate tender.
MOTH
14   And I, tough senior, as an appertinent title to your
15   old time, which we may name tough.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
16   Pretty and apt.
MOTH
17   How mean you, sir? I pretty, and my saying apt? or
18   I apt, and my saying pretty?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
19   Thou pretty, because little.
MOTH
20   Little pretty, because little. Wherefore apt?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
21   And therefore apt, because quick.
MOTH
22   Speak you this in my praise, master?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
23   In thy condign praise.
MOTH
24   I will praise an eel with the same praise.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
25   What, that an eel is ingenious?
MOTH
26   That an eel is quick.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
27   I do say thou art quick in answers: thou heatest my blood.
MOTH
28   I am answered, sir.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
29   I love not to be crossed.
MOTH
Aside
30    He speaks the mere contrary; crosses love not him.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
31   I have promised to study three years with the duke.
MOTH
32   You may do it in an hour, sir.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
33   Impossible.
MOTH
34   How many is one thrice told?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
35   I am ill at reckoning; it fitteth the spirit of a tapster.
MOTH
36   You are a gentleman and a gamester, sir.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
37   I confess both: they are both the varnish of a
38   complete man.
MOTH
39   Then, I am sure, you know how much the gross sum of
40   deuce-ace amounts to.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
41   It doth amount to one more than two.
MOTH
42   Which the base vulgar do call three.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
43   True.
MOTH
44   Why, sir, is this such a piece of study? Now here
45   is three studied, ere ye'll thrice wink: and how
46   easy it is to put 'years' to the word 'three,' and
47   study three years in two words, the dancing horse
48   will tell you.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
49   A most fine figure!
MOTH
50   To prove you a cipher.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
51   I will hereupon confess I am in love: and as it is
52   base for a soldier to love, so am I in love with a
53   base wench. If drawing my sword against the humour
54   of affection would deliver me from the reprobate
55   thought of it, I would take Desire prisoner, and
56   ransom him to any French courtier for a new-devised
57   courtesy. I think scorn to sigh: methinks I should
58   outswear Cupid. Comfort, me, boy: what great men
59   have been in love?
MOTH
60   Hercules, master.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
61   Most sweet Hercules! More authority, dear boy, name
62   more; and, sweet my child, let them be men of good
63   repute and carriage.
MOTH
64   Samson, master: he was a man of good carriage, great
65   carriage, for he carried the town-gates on his back
66   like a porter: and he was in love.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
67   O well-knit Samson! strong-jointed Samson! I do
68   excel thee in my rapier as much as thou didst me in
69   carrying gates. I am in love too. Who was Samson's
70   love, my dear Moth?
MOTH
71   A woman, master.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
72   Of what complexion?
MOTH
73   Of all the four, or the three, or the two, or one of the four.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
74   Tell me precisely of what complexion.
MOTH
75   Of the sea-water green, sir.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
76   Is that one of the four complexions?
MOTH
77   As I have read, sir; and the best of them too.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
78   Green indeed is the colour of lovers; but to have a
79   love of that colour, methinks Samson had small reason
80   for it. He surely affected her for her wit.
MOTH
81   It was so, sir; for she had a green wit.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
82   My love is most immaculate white and red.
MOTH
83   Most maculate thoughts, master, are masked under
84   such colours.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
85   Define, define, well-educated infant.
MOTH
86   My father's wit and my mother's tongue, assist me!
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
87   Sweet invocation of a child; most pretty and
88   pathetical!
MOTH
89   If she be made of white and red,
90   Her faults will ne'er be known,
91   For blushing cheeks by faults are bred
92   And fears by pale white shown:
93   Then if she fear, or be to blame,
94   By this you shall not know,
95   For still her cheeks possess the same
96   Which native she doth owe.
97   A dangerous rhyme, master, against the reason of
98   white and red.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
99   Is there not a ballad, boy, of the King and the Beggar?
MOTH
100  The world was very guilty of such a ballad some
101  three ages since: but I think now 'tis not to be
102  found; or, if it were, it would neither serve for
103  the writing nor the tune.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
104  I will have that subject newly writ o'er, that I may
105  example my digression by some mighty precedent.
106  Boy, I do love that country girl that I took in the
107  park with the rational hind Costard: she deserves well.
MOTH
Aside
108   To be whipped; and yet a better love than
109  my master.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
110  Sing, boy; my spirit grows heavy in love.
MOTH
111  And that's great marvel, loving a light wench.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
112  I say, sing.
MOTH
113  Forbear till this company be past.
Enter DULL, COSTARD, and JAQUENETTA

DULL
114  Sir, the duke's pleasure is, that you keep Costard
115  safe: and you must suffer him to take no delight
116  nor no penance; but a' must fast three days a week.
117  For this damsel, I must keep her at the park: she
118  is allowed for the day-woman. Fare you well.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
119  I do betray myself with blushing. Maid!
JAQUENETTA
120  Man?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
121  I will visit thee at the lodge.
JAQUENETTA
122  That's hereby.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
123  I know where it is situate.
JAQUENETTA
124  Lord, how wise you are!
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
125  I will tell thee wonders.
JAQUENETTA
126  With that face?
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
127  I love thee.
JAQUENETTA
128  So I heard you say.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
129  And so, farewell.
JAQUENETTA
130  Fair weather after you!
DULL
131  Come, Jaquenetta, away!
Exeunt DULL and JAQUENETTA

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
132  Villain, thou shalt fast for thy offences ere thou
133  be pardoned.
COSTARD
134  Well, sir, I hope, when I do it, I shall do it on a
135  full stomach.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
136  Thou shalt be heavily punished.
COSTARD
137  I am more bound to you than your fellows, for they
138  are but lightly rewarded.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
139  Take away this villain; shut him up.
MOTH
140  Come, you transgressing slave; away!
COSTARD
141  Let me not be pent up, sir: I will fast, being loose.
MOTH
142  No, sir; that were fast and loose: thou shalt to prison.
COSTARD
143  Well, if ever I do see the merry days of desolation
144  that I have seen, some shall see.
MOTH
145  What shall some see?
COSTARD
146  Nay, nothing, Master Moth, but what they look upon.
147  It is not for prisoners to be too silent in their
148  words; and therefore I will say nothing: I thank
149  God I have as little patience as another man; and
150  therefore I can be quiet.
Exeunt MOTH and COSTARD

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
151  I do affect the very ground, which is base, where
152  her shoe, which is baser, guided by her foot, which
153  is basest, doth tread. I shall be forsworn, which
154  is a great argument of falsehood, if I love. And
155  how can that be true love which is falsely
156  attempted? Love is a familiar; Love is a devil:
157  there is no evil angel but Love. Yet was Samson so
158  tempted, and he had an excellent strength; yet was
159  Solomon so seduced, and he had a very good wit.
160  Cupid's butt-shaft is too hard for Hercules' club;
161  and therefore too much odds for a Spaniard's rapier.
162  The first and second cause will not serve my turn;
163  the passado he respects not, the duello he regards
164  not: his disgrace is to be called boy; but his
165  glory is to subdue men. Adieu, valour! rust rapier!
166  be still, drum! for your manager is in love; yea,
167  he loveth. Assist me, some extemporal god of rhyme,
168  for I am sure I shall turn sonnet. Devise, wit;
169  write, pen; for I am for whole volumes in folio.
Exit

< (Previous) ACT I, SCENE IACT II, SCENE I (Next) >
Scene Index
ACT I
  • SCENE I
  • SCENE II


  • ACT II
  • SCENE I


  • ACT III
  • SCENE I


  • ACT IV
  • SCENE I
  • SCENE II
  • SCENE III


  • ACT V
  • SCENE I
  • SCENE II

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